Inspired by Denise Richards, and who isn’t

Of course she’s living the high life and has someone come to her house and spray tan her skinny ass. My tan in a can is the next best thing. Forget the gruesome Mystic tan where you stand naked, like a weirdo in shower cap while the too dark paint sprays you. It starts rubbing off in 2 days, and not in a natural way.

A friend told me about this and I think it’s the next best thing to a real tan. Neutrogena spray mist, about $9 at Target. I go out on my patio, dried off after a shower and spray away. It takes 1 minute, it’s easy and almost goof-proof. I blow dry my hair while it dries, then get dressed. It starts looking like something after a couple hours. A few quick coats and I looked like a less freckled, darker version of myself. I’ve tried most of the tanning lotions and potions, and this is the easiest. It’s my favorite. Gotta go hit the beach, on my back porch.