Google an Ex to feel terrific

Especially if he’s gone all puffy.

Saw Oprah last week with the abused woman who shot her husband 11 times. And I thought “hmmm whatever happened to my jackass ex?” So I found him online, all 200 pounds of him, but oops he’s only 5′7″. And hasn’t aged well, he looks way older than our 8-year age difference. Girls really used to dig him. Wow, how times have changed.

We haven’t been in touch for 14 years, since I left Austin. And I won’t contact him now, cause I love that he has no idea where I am. But I was sorta tempted, cause I think I look good for 40-something. But more importantly, I have a good life, one that I like. I know, I know it’s not a competition, but if it was I want to win. It sure made me feel even more grateful for how my life has turned out. Seems like it was all so long ago, me married to someone all wrong for me and very unhappy. Who was that dumb-ass girl married to the mean cheating asshole??

He’s still in the hotel business and moves around. Probably as he bangs his way through the girls in each city. New Jersey, Oklahoma City, Fort Worth, all the big glam-hotels. I have not missed a thing. Ugg. and Ick.

Oh how I would love to show y’all his fat face, but that would just be mean.