April 2010

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I can’t believe buying my first house has become so crazy.

Once you see something you like enough to spend your money on, you quickly make an offer over asking price. It’s nuts actually. There’s no time to even think about it.

The competition is fierce in LA, and I’m supposedly a qualified buyer. Not qualified enough that I have all cash, like some freaks do. Though I’ve been saving for years, have 20% down and good credit. But houses here are going fast and for so far over the asking price, you’ve gotta be ready to spend big the minute you see the house. I just got outbid by 60k. On a tiny 400k house. I offered over asking, but someone else wanted it way more than I did, and offered 480k. That’s extreme, but it happens.

I remember a friend telling me they finally got the 7th house they tried for, only because another buyer backed out. At the time I thought that sounded pitiful. The purchase of a lifetime, so randomly happening. How can you possibly like 7 houses enough to buy I wondered.

Six months later, I’ve loved 3 houses and been overbid each time so I sorta get it. Each place was perfect at the time. Each over-bidder, just another asshole with more money than me.

Is that your ratty old couch cushion out on the 405 freeway?

For the last week I’ve driven by a big, filthy cushion on the ramp to the 405. It’s in that triangular striped area where no one drives, so it hasn’t moved all week. If I had a police escort, I would pick it up just cause I’m sick of looking at it.

How the hell did it get there? Someone lost it while they were driving and kept going? Oh come on, I bet it was something more sinister.

Like when you see a suitcase full of clothes tossed out on the freeway. I’m sure that was no accident. I imagine somebody stuck something in someone they shouldn’t have and public revenge seemed fair. Or someone just didn’t have the balls to break up, and tossing their clothes onto the freeway seemed a good messaging alternative.

Nothing says “We should talk but I don’t wanna” like the old stuff-on-the-highway trick.